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Birthday Party & Softball Playoff

15 Aug

Yes, we both managed….I still don’t know how. Sucessfully even.

Frasier not only didn’t lose any children successfully managed the birthday party but a good time was had by all! He took THE SPED with her walker through the mall to Rainforest Cafe AND he also brought a bag on his on volition to carry the gifts home.  He even wrote who gave what on a list! WHOOOT!!! I guess this means I have to actually will have to write will know who to send the thank you notes to.  Rock on bebbeh! Also as special shout out goes to one of my new mommy friends. SUPER J thanks so much for helping out Frasier out!! We WICKED appreciate it! Lots of ❤ for all of the pictures you took for us.

I brought Ketchup with me to Textface’s softball game. I felt guilty the entire time.  Never have I felt more torn about where I was supposed to be. It was so freaking hot at the game and Jackass was dressed in a long pants, button down shirt and a tie.  He wanted to look hot for the single mom’s had to work later. Textface played okay and everyone else on her team did.  They got KILLED during the game. Absolutely crushed. I think the score was like 24 to 10.  Some of the girls were crying as if it was the end of the world because they played so hard all season.

(RANT ALERT BEGIN:  Luckily I didn’t start this blog during softball season otherwise you would’ve had the pleasure to read the rants of “creepy father”. I am going to give you a little snap shot of why I hope Textface isn’t on the same team as “creepy father’s” daughter’s next season. He comes to the games when his daughter isn’t there and hangs out in the dugout. He started a team website to host team photos and for parents to post when their girls aren’t going to play.  He talks to the parents on how their girls can improve and thinks it’s funny when he jokes with the parents when our daugthers should have a double but got a triple. “She shouldn’t have made it to 3rd” and thinks he’s funny.  Wait for it…. he is NOT a coach.  Which is what makes him “creep father”.  No, I am NOT hard of hearing I just think you are f$cking weird and if I pretend I can’t hear you maybe you will stop talking to me. No, I am not blind when I pass you as I walk to the field, I don’t want to know you. I wish you and all your creepiness would move to another town. When I  travel and you offer to pick up Textface to drive her to the game, I say thank you and tell you we’ll figure it out; I really mean THERE IS NO WAY she will ever get in the car with you.  For all of the reasons and many more you are “creepy father”. You’ve earned it. RANT ALERT END)

Once we all got home, Frasier and THE SPED were so happy.  Frasier was so pleased that he did such a good job at the party.  THE SPED wanted to open every gift at that very moment.  She had stuff everywhere! Diego this, Princess that, Mickey Mouse thing-a-ma-jig.  I sat there taking in all the details saying to myself….Wow, not every dad would be able to manage a 5 year old kid friend party but your husband did.  Textface was even already joking about how badly they did and Ketchup didn’t even try to pile it on.  Glad I picked so well the 2nd time around in the husband department and my girls were all so happy.


Divide And Conquer

7 Aug

This will give you some sort of reference for how ridiculous our lives can be even when we try to plan things out perfectly.  (Bloggers note: This might be difficult to follow.) Textface plays softball and I’ll admit she’s gotten quite good over the past season.  There are only 5 teams in her league and they hold the first place all season. THE SPED wants to plan her friend birthday party on a weekend that most of her friends will be around.  We plan THE SPED’s birthday party 2 Saturdays AFTER the end of Softball season figuring there is absolutely NO WAY softball playoffs will go on that long.  How could it there are only 5 freaking teams?  I will tell you how it can go on for TEN days……the fathers in our lovely town that coach softball think that 7/8 grade softball with 5 teams needs to have a double elimination that’s how.  Don’t they know this isn’t the World  Series or the Stanley Cup playoffs? This is a small town with girls in it that want to play softball with some willing parents that will schlep them down to the field and cheer them on.  Is a double elimination necessary?

Frasier and I hold our breath.  Of course, we are cheering on Textface to win.  We WANT her to win.  Only on the night that she loses do we look at the playoff brackets and notice that if she wins every game from now till the end of the playoffs she will have her final play off game on the same freaking Saturday as THE SPED’s friend party.  Yes, you’ve guess it, same time too…..Softball game is at 11 am and THE SPED party is at 11:30. Three more games to go until we know what our fate will hold.

I attend all of the playoff games which is no small feat!  In order to be there I have to leave work a half hour early. Because of course most of the other mommies in my town are stay at home mom’s so committed to their daughter’s sport so it isn’t a problem that games start at 6.  For me however, I have to hope no one notices or cares that I’m leaving early AGAIN.  I go to every game, with a smile on, hoping that she wins. We’ll figure out Saturday if it comes to that.

It’s the last game, Thursday night, if they win tonight they play on Saturday.  They are losing and losing badly. Jackass is sitting on the bleachers and I am sitting in my chair behind home plate where I always sit.   Somehow, they end up tied in the 7th inning. I really don’t want to sit through another inning if they keep it tied. Textface’s team is up, they only have one out, two on base, it’s bottom of the 7th, Textface is up at bat.  I really want her to do well; I really don’t want her to get out otherwise the car ride home will be brutal. I am doing the mommy prayer that we all do in our heads, tapping my feet on the ground and I honestly believe I am more nervous that she is. I am bargaining with God “only a line drive and I’ll be nice to everyone, just a line drive”.  The first pitch, strike.  The second pitch, ball.  Can’t this be over all ready.  The next pitch is PERFECT and she nails it and hits a triple.  THEY. WIN. THE. GAME.

It’s only after she gets a bunch of high fives, the team is going crazy and the coach calls them over to talk about the NEXT GAME. RIGHT. This means they are playing on Saturday. F@ck! But, but, now what? We have a party on Saturday. Really? Can’t we get this over with and play the game tomorrow? Do we have to drag it out? Unfortunately, nope, that isn’t how things work out for us.

So Plan B is Frasier does the “drop off Birthday Party” (yes, I did say drop off) for a bunch of 5 year old SPED’s and I will go to the game. THE SPED’s party is at  Rainforest Cafe.  How will he do?